Shopping, Build A Bear and Earrings!

The morning started off with our 1 month post placement visit with our social worker. It went well. We love our social worker. She's so sweet and has helped us get through some hard times.  The girls were good today and she could tell that they are adjusting well.  She stayed about an hour.  We will see her again in 5 months for our 6 month post placement visit.

After that was done, we loaded up the van and headed to the mall. We had some gift cards to Justice and Build A Bear that some friends gave to us.  I'm not a big fan of Justice. But Maggie sure is. She would have bought everything in that store if we were millionaires.  LOL  She did find 2 outfits, Hope found 1 shirt, Jadyn found 1 shirt and Hope & Maggie bought 2 watches each (they were buy 2 get 2 free).  I had my 40% off coupon.  So thankful for the coupons.  And thankful for the gift card (Thanks Deb).

Then we went to Build A Bear.  The girls were a little overwhelmed with the choices.  But they did choose their bears.  The people there were AMAZING!  They could tell that the girls could not speak English. So they used body motions when it was time to get the "heart" ready for their bear.  Hope & Maggie participated with HUGE smiles.  They loved giving their bear a bath.  Then shopping for an outfit.  Maggie chose a bride outfit (she's so much like her big sis Tiff).  Hope chose a jean outfit.  We had 2 gift cards (Thank you Alisa) and a $10 gift card I bought months ago, and then the store gave us a coupon.  So thankful for the blessings we've received.....

Then we went to Children's Place. Hope needs pants.  I had a coupon there.  We found a few things for the girls.  Jadyn found a hat.  She looks good in hats.  :-)

Maggie kept asking us to get her ears pierced.  We kept telling her it will hurt. She said she knew.  So we went to Claire's  They were SO sweet to Maggie.  Maggie chose her earrings (she liked the birthstone for Feb).  Then the first ear went.  She did not move.  She acted like she did not feel it. Then the 2nd ear. Same thing, did not flinch.  The lady gave her the mirror and Maggie had a HUGE smile.  She is so happy.

Then it was time to go.  I was exhausted. Ethan was AWESOME!  He's usually not a shopper and complains the whole time. not today. he just sat in the stroller.  So thankful he was good.

Now we are resting after eating lunch.  I could use a nap.  Not sure that will happen.  LOL

Chinese Food in America

Last night we ordered Chinese Food for dinner.  Did not realize it's been 3 weeks since we ate real Chinese food.  (Yeah, I have not missed it).  Bill thought it would be fun to see what the girls think.  We ordered more than we usually do (since we do have 2 more BIG mouths to feed).  Bill took Hope & Maggie with him to pick it up.  He said they did not talk. But they looked at the menu and pointed to things they wanted.  He said it was like they were in Heaven.  Stuff from HOME!

They got home and we dished everything out.  The girls could not wait.  And guess what???  SUCCESS!  They LOVED it.  Of course they wanted more.  (we gave them a little more).  Then I told them "school tomorrow" and they cheered (they knew they were eating this for lunch at school).

Here are some pictures.  Of course I took pictures of them eating their first American Chinese Food.  LOL

We are trying to teach Maggie to eat without bringing her face to the plate.  Hard to break some habits.  

Couldn't leave our Abby & Jadyn.  :-)

Maggie being silly

Hope showing me her rice

School Update

Is it wrong of me to say how I LOVE the quiet during the day?  I have enjoyed 5 of our 6 kids being in school.  Yes, I miss them by the end of the school day.  But honestly it's nice having the break.  But the 3 hours everyone is home between school and bedtime it is LOUD here.  I'm exhausted.  LOL

Hope and Maggie LOVE school.  They get in the car with HUGE smiles on their faces.  Yesterday & today they earned a "character trait" ticket (or something like that) for being good.  This is like gold to them.  They are proud of this ticket and keep it in their binder.  Today they showed me immediately and said "TWO".

My anxiety was over car line.  Yesterday morning was the first time to drop them off in the morning.  And oh boy.....They got out and walked between cars to get to the other side of the line to get to the gate we kept telling them they needed to go through.  I quickly rolled down my window and yelled "NOOOOO" and motioned to go to the sidewalk next to our car. A teacher came over with a big smile on her face and helped them.  We have been going over "do not pass the yellow line. Follow the kids".

Today when I picked them up a teacher walked them to the car and she had a big smile on her face.  She said "I love that your girls get the biggest smile on their faces when they spot the van".  I thought she was going to cry when she was telling me this.  She was genuine. I thanked her & the other teacher helping our girls for making sure they were safe.  I'm praising God for the people He is putting in their day.  So many have been so kind to help them.

This morning I had to take the girls to the doctor for a 2 week follow up.  The doctor was amazed at the changes she noticed. She said they look healthier.  Hope's heart murmur was almost non-existent. She is wondering if she was dehydrated 2 weeks ago.  That's possible.  I took a photo of the girls while we were waiting.

The girls were not happy that they were missing school.  Another praise.  When I was signing them in at the school office, a boy walked by.  Maggie smiled, waved and said "HI" to him. He did a little wave and said hi and kept walking.  She came to me and said something in Chinese while pointing to herself.  I think she told me he is a friend.  They did tell us yesterday that they made some friends.  And the school told me that they have been paired with a few girls during the day in their classes and the girls are so sweet to Hope & Maggie.  Another praise.  

Yesterday when Maggie was going through her binder, we came across this.  Bill & I both said "Well this did not take long".  LOL  

The girls have 2 spelling test tomorrow and a geography test too.  They want them to try.  The girls know how to write the words, but not sure they remember what the words are.  Their teachers have been great.  No expectations.  They just want them to try.  I think the goal right now is to learn the language.  

God is with our girls.  They are HAPPY.  They can't wait to go to school.  I'm so thankful for the people he's putting in their lives.  I don't know why I was worried.  God has been in this adoption from the beginning.  Why would I question Him being with the girls now?  

Each day is getting easier. The girls are happier now that they are in school.  They miss us.  They want to be here now.  They told our friend last night that they know we love them.  A week ago they did not feel like we were family.  So much has changed.  We still have a long way to go.  But I am seeing improvements.  

First Day=Success!

I am HAPPY to report that Hope & Maggie had a GOOD day today.  I was nervous all day long.

We arrived at the school at 8:45, like the counselor asked us to.  We waited in the front office for 30 minutes before they called us back.  We met the 6th grade counselor and also their ELL aid.  We were so happy to see that the aid is someone who goes to our church. What a blessing from God. I immediately felt safer leaving the girls.  Because someone who knew us was going to be around them all day.  We received their schedules, the aid mapped out where their classes will be. And then we said our goodbyes.

The girls are in 6th grade. They are in the lower 6th grade classes. They are together all day. They have 7 classes. 7 teachers.  I was a nervous wreck.  Then they said that most of the kids in their 1st period will be with them the whole day.  So they will just follow the kids.  And the aid will help them too.

It's 4 PM and we get in the van to go to the middle school.  As we come around to the front of the school, I see the girls.  They are standing with a teacher, patiently waiting.  They spotted our van, and just waited.  Praise God. I was so afraid Hope would run out towards us.  The teacher came over to us and introduced herself to us. She is the Exceptional Ed teacher and she is with the girls in a few of their classes.  She is very sweet and nice.

The girls get in the van and Hope immediately wanted to show us her homework.  Yep, they got homework and they were excited about it.  BUT......I panicked.  They had math.  Not 1+1 problems but multiplication of fractions.  SERIOUSLY?????  So we take it out. We see that they did the same worksheet in school.  So Bill sat down and Hope went at it.  This girl KNOWS math!  Seriously, she does.  She was doing the problems in her head, and fast.  We were shocked!  Maggie on the other hand does not understand addition. :-(

They also have 5 spelling words.  Not sure what to do with them. And also a 4 page science sheet.  Um....they were to read things and analyze it or something. This we did not do. And Hope was freaking out because we were not doing it.  So Bill typed in some in the translator. Not sure how accurate it translated because they gave us a look like "WHAT???"  Exactly is what we said.  LOL

I did email all of their teachers introducing myself.  And one replied telling me to take one day at a time. And she thinks by the end of Sept we'll see huge changes.  So keep praying!

Here are a few photos of the girls doing their homework.  They said they want to go back to school.  They liked it.  But they did not make any friends.  Keep praying for them.  That they will feel safe.  and that they will make friends, good friends who will not influence them to the wrong things.

First Day of School!!

The day has finally come.  The girls first day of school. Oh my goodness are they excited. Last night we were typing some things into the translator to help them with today.  They were understanding and so excited.  Please pray for them.  We told them "this is not like China school".  (Vicky thank you for your post because I would have never thought that they would expect school to be like their school in China).

They went to bed last night with no problems.  They had complained that we put them to bed too early. Well last night there were no complaints.  They knew that when they woke up they were going to school!

We packed their backpacks and lunches last night.  I helped pick out their outfits for today. They don't understand there is a dress code. They don't understand they are going to middle school and certain clothes they do have might get them picked on (they are small for their ages so we are limited on clothing choices/styles).  They cooperated with my choice of outfits and laid them out so they were ready when they woke up.

So now, here it is, about 30 min before we have to leave.  They are fed, dressed and anxious to leave.  I had to put on a Chinese Dance DVD for them to occupy them until it's time to leave.

Of course, I took the annual 1st day of school photos of the girls.  And oh my did they pose.  Seriously these girls are changing.  I used to have to BEG to get a photo.  Now I just point at the camera, and tell them where to stand.  When I told them to stand together, well just look at the photo. I did not notice it when I took the pictures.  THEY ARE HOLDING HANDS!!!!!!

I will update tonight on how their first day went.  Please pray.  Thanks so much!

4 Weeks!

I can not believe 4 weeks ago today we met Hope & Maggie for the very first time.  Honestly, it seems like so much longer than 4 weeks.  So much has happened and so much has changed.  I wish I could say that things felt normal.  That everyone is doing well. That we are the poster family for older child adoptions.  But I can't.  We have our good days and also our bad days.  I can say, that the good is more frequent than the bad.  But the bad times have been very hard.  I have to keep reminding myself that it's only been 4 weeks.

A dear friend sent me this verse this morning.  Just when I needed to hear it.

"Do not worry about anything; Instead pray about everything. Tell God what you need. And thank him for what he has done. 7 Then you will experience God's peace, which exceeds anything we can understand.  His peace will guard your hearts & minds as you live in Christ Jesus".  
Philippians 4:6-7

I need to keep reminding myself this. I also need to keep reminding myself that God chose us to be their parents.  Nobody said adoption was easy.  And it's not.  I'm thankful that we have the support to help us when we need it.  Lets just say this morning was not good. But the rest of the day has gotten much better.

The struggles we're facing are more attachment issues I believe.  And of course the language barrier.  Maggie is starting to understand us more and more.  So she's helping to translate things to Hope.  After talking to our social worker today, we are going to make a chart for Hope showing her consequences for her behavior that is not acceptable.  We are going to have it in English and Chinese (we'll ask our friend to help us with that).  I also thought about making a "star" chart for both Hope & Maggie for school.  For every day they have a good report or good day from school, they get a star.  For every 5 stars they receive, they get a reward.  The reward could be an Icee, or treat from McD's etc.  I wanted to include Maggie in this too because she has been good.

So please continue to pray for us.  Pray for the girls as they start school tomorrow. They are very excited.  Pray for us as we drop them off.  That there will be no issues during the day and that carline will go smoothly every day.

Here are some photos for you.  I can already see the difference in the girls appearance.  I think they both have put on some weight.  :-)  And look at their facial expressions.  Wow!

Gotcha Day  8/6/12

Today.  9/3/12

Being Silly!  

Blessings from God

This has been a CRAZY week.  Another exhausting week.  But I think some good has come out of it.

Monday was a "hurricane" day so schools were canceled.  We had hoped to get an answer from the middle school on Monday about what grade the girls would be in. But....since the schools were closed, then we knew no phone call.  We did our best to enjoy the day. And honestly each day is getting easier.

Tuesday came and we received a return call from the ELL director from the school district (I believe).  She basically told us the same thing.  "We place students based on their ages." So they should be in 7th and 8th grades.  Bill pleaded our concerns and even went as far to say "You guys will have them all day, you will see. And we do not want to get a phone call every day because they are so lost and overwhelmed being placed in the wrong grade".  She said if the middle school was okay with both being in 7th grade then that was fine. But she did not feel we could put both in 6th grade.

So, seeing as the girls would most likely be in 7th grade, I called our pediatrician's office and asked to get the girls their 7th grade shots.  We were seen the next day.

Wednesday we go to the doctor's office, they get their shots.  They did great!  No fussing or crying.  Then....because I'm tired of waiting for the school to call, we drive to the school. I had all the necessary paperwork to enroll the girls.  When we were waiting for the counselor, we told the girls we were at school. Maggie almost jumped through the roof with excitement.  Hope was excited too.  Unfortunately when she acts up (which was several times during our 30 min at the school) we say "Be good or no school". She immediately changes her tune and behaves.  We met the counselor that we were talking to and she was SUPER nice.  She said "So, are you still wanting to put them in 6th grade?"  We said "Absolutely but we understand the district policies".  She said "I'm going to push for 6th grade but I need to talk to the principal. I will call you this afternoon".  We left excited and hopeful.

At 4:30 she called. She said "The principal agreed.  The girls are enrolled in 6th grade". I was so happy and thanked her for advocating for our girls.  The girls will start this Tuesday.  They have an ELL aid who will help them.  I'm not sure how their schedule will be. I'm a nervous wreck. I have major anxiety about dropping them off and picking them up. I have anxiety about them getting lost during the day going from class to class.  Then I need to remind myself that they are 12 & 13.  They are smart. After a day or two they will get the routine and be fine.  At least that is what I'm praying for.  The school keeps telling me "don't worry. you will be amazed at the changes in the girls in a few short months".

On Friday we met a mom from our church.  I'm not sure how long she has been going, but it has not been too long. She is from China. And speaks Mandarin and English.  She spent about 3 hours with the girls on Friday.  Talking to them about school. Telling them they need to raise their hands, they need to ask to use the bathroom, to close the door & lock it when they are using it. She told Hope not to pull her pants down at school or lift her shirt up (this is something she does all the time when we are in public).  She also tested them some on their ABC's and 123's.  She said they are very smart.  Just from her observation, she could tell Hope is smart and learns quickly.  But Hope is active and does not act like she's 13.  Maggie is more quiet and wants to learn but takes a little longer.

She also asked them a few things.  We asked her to ask Hope why has she been crying at night.  Both girls said they miss the orphanage.  (this is new to us).  Maggie also told her a few things that she is not happy about.  1) she said this is not her home.  Her home is the orphanage. She knows they have parents who abandoned them and the orphanage is their family now.  2) Maggie does not think Hope is her sister.  (We were told that the Chinese people think if you are not blood related, then you are not related.) 3) Maggie was mad that Bill took a bracelet away from her and telling her it was Jadyn's.  Story about this.....She got into Jadyn's craft set.  Made a bracelet. Then destroyed it and wanted to make another one using more supplies.  Bill got upset because she was wasting the supplies.  4) Maggie was showing Bill a photo of one of the babies from the orphanage.  She would tell Bill something. He would say "no".  Well, Maggie was telling Bill that we need to adopt this baby. He's nicer than Ethan.  (that last comment upset us. We know Maggie does not like Ethan because he does yell at her. She babies him and he does not like it. I don't think she realizes he's almost 4).  5) Maggie does not like it that we won't let them eat all the time.  They say they are always hungry.  We explained to our friend that they eat a ton of food and we do have to cut it off. We do not eat or snack all day long.  And they have plenty of food when it is time to eat.  6) They are nervous about school. They are afraid the kids will make fun of them.

We did have our friend tell them that WE chose THEM.  That the orphanage did not ship them off.  We wanted them and we love them.  They smiled and acted like they understood.

A lot of what we were told surprised us. Because 1) They are SO excited about school. They have never shown us fear or anxiety about going.  2) They have never even acted like they miss the orphanage. They laugh, hug, kiss etc all day long.  I'm sure they do miss it. And I'm glad they miss it. If they did not miss it then I would be worried.

Our friend said we can call her ANY time.  And they can come over and play with her kids.  The girls were happy to hear this.  And I think we will be calling her.  After she left, the girls were different. In a good way.  Almost happier.  Not sure if it was because of some of the things we clarified. Or if because they know there is someone here "just like them".

I also made doctor appointments for the girls.  Hope & Maggie are scheduled to go to Shriners Hospital on Tuesday Sept 11th for an orthopedic evaluation.  Hope is scheduled for her EKG on Thursday Sept 13 and then on Tuesday Sept 18th Hope is scheduled to see the Neurologist.  We are praying that we can receive answers on these unexpected medical needs.

I can not believe that tomorrow will be 4 weeks since we met the girls.  I have to keep reminding myself how far they have come.  Language is the biggest hurdle we are facing right now.  Maggie seems to understand what we are saying a lot of the times.  She just can't verbally express herself in English.  Hope understands and is trying to be verbal.  Hope is very eager to learn.

I truly feel God was with us this week.  He made the school situation "easy".  I knew if the school met the girls they would understand our concerns.  And God also sent this wonderful woman here.  We are so thankful for the BIG blessings we received this week.  I feel this is a  God "hug" reminding us that He is with us. He has not forgotten about us. We are doing what HE wants us to do.  We needed this. Because some days have been very hard.  We're so thankful that He sends us these little "hugs".

Here is a photo from today.  Abby was doing Rosetta Stone in Mandarin.  Hope was doing Rosetta Stone in English.  :-)